Conflict

 I've been involved in a lot of conflict recently that has sent my mind spiralling and caused me to question who I am. I've done a lot of journaling and if I've had a vent to others I've reflected upon the messages ive been desperate to get  from others that I'm not telling myself.

Sometimes when I so desperately want another to say "I'm sorry" or " you've done your best and that's always enough" or some other words of compassion, comfort or understanding and I fight with them in desperation to get it I realise that I'm fighting the wrong person.

I should be fighting myself to offer up all this love and understanding to myself and I shouldn't be fighting others or engaging in any kind of conversation for it. 

Ofcourse it's nice to have a tribe, to have family and friends there for you but that should only ever be a bonus to the love and care you give to yourself... 

Here are some affirmations if you find yourself struggling with the same thing. 

Google is great eh 😅

I am deserving of self-compassion.

I am enough.

I am whole and complete.

I am proud of who I am.

I am grateful for who I am.

I am a priority.

I am deserving of love and respect.

I am kind to myself.

I am doing the best that I can.

I am worthy of love and respect.

I am gentle and understanding with myself.

I am compassion.

I am free to make the decisions that are best for me.

I am a beautiful being.

I am becoming a better friend to myself.

I am patient and loving with myself as I change and grow.

I am going to show up for myself today.

I am not my mistakes.

I am doing the best that I can right now.

I am kind and compassionate towards myself.

I am a perfectly imperfect human being growing and learning and doing my best and that is always enough. 

And lastly. Here is something that I read that really alleviated a lot of pain for me when I was receiving a lot of abuse. It's worth a read for anyone questioning their worth following a rupture.